What to Drink After Finals Week

If you were to take a survey of college students, chances are that at least 7 out of every 10 students would say that they have been repeat offenders of procrastination. They goofed around the entire semester, and then when the last week arrived and finals were looming in the air, they realized that it was time to crack down or risk seeing the same boring professor again next semester and feeling like an idiot. With that said, there are one of two scenarios that could happen: either you could ace the final and skid by with barely a C in the class (hey, C’s and D’s still get degrees, right?!), or you could fail miserably, humiliating yourself even further, doomed to grace that damn lecture hall at least once more. Either way, there are drinks to assist with both.

Scenario 1: So you took your finals and waited all week to see what you would get in the class and lo and behold YOU PASS! What do you go out and drink? Anything! You’ve literally just proven that you’re pretty much a genius. Now is the perfect time to have a great time. I suggest anything fruity. It tastes good and keeps your mood up. For example, a margarita infused with any of your favorite fruit flavors will work wonders, as will fruity mojitos, daquaris, etc. Actually, any of your favorite drinks will work. After all, you are celebrating. This would also be the perfect time for SHOTS! That’s right, Jello shots, vodka shots, tequila shots, etc. If you can down it, you deserve it!

Unfortunately, there is the possiblility of utter and complete failure. Thus leading us to scenario two.

Scenario 2: You fail the final, and subsequently must repeat the class. This one is simple, bypass all the fun drinks and head strait to the depressing dark liquor. Whiskey, Rum, whatever you drink when you bask in self-pity will do just fine. Don’t forget the depressing music. Repeat for a week straight and you’ll be fine. You’ll still have to retake the class, but at least for a while you’ll be drunk enough to stop crying.